Author: Dann Corbit
Date: 12:53:20 04/11/01
Go up one level in this thread
On April 11, 2001 at 15:21:07, Jonas Cohonas wrote: >On April 11, 2001 at 14:59:56, Dann Corbit wrote: >>On April 11, 2001 at 12:36:34, Paul Doire wrote: [snip] >>On the other, other hand -- you do have a good point. We can be contrary and >>still be civil about it. On the other, other, other hand -- we should not >>become offended at every contrary remark. A wise man once said, "The taking of >>offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid one." [snip] >>Friendly is a good idea. [snip] >To disagree and being rude is two different things and i read paul's post as >being about the rudeness that seems to prevail here at times and not the fact >that, when you voice your opinions people will either agree or disagree, but >when you disagree then do it in a polite way and dont be rude. I found paul's >post to very relevant and i did not take offence to any of his points. > >"I am glad that my interest is the same as those that frequent this place,but I >am equally glad that my personality is not the same as the ruthless, arrogant >bastards that blow everyone off this board."(paul) > >>"This (the above) is the epitomy of rutheless arrogance. In fact, it is one of >>the most ruthless and arrogant statements I have ever read on this board. On >>the other hand, I don't think it is so horrible that it ought to be censored, >>even though you have accused some large fraction of the readership in the most >>negative way."(dan) > >If you read the last part in paul's statement, it is only directed to people >here, few or many i don't know, who only voice their opinion in a negative way >and i see nothing arrogant or ruthless in pointing that out, it seems like >someone has to make it a point since some people here cannot see that for >themselves. As you can see from the parts I left in, I agree completely with the friendly part. On the other hand, most of the time when people take offense it has very little to do with friendly/unfriendly and very much to do with being simply unable to withstand any sort of criticism. Being friendly is part of being civilized. And yet civilized people are also unfriendly at times. The thing to be aimed for is to be as polite as we can without walking on eggshells or losing our personality. I suppose what we are heading for is a day when it is impossible to say anything which might be perceived as negative. Well, I'm not ever going to go there, [though I do temper my speach (believe it or not).] I think that we should all consider the feelings of others. But the other half of the equation is not to become needlessly offended. Often, when we get mad about criticism what it means is that we are actually very unsure of our position and do not know how to respond to the criticism in a sensible way. Well, that's usually what it means when I fly off the handle. ;-)
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