Author: Christophe Theron
Date: 23:40:17 02/28/00
Go up one level in this thread
On February 28, 2000 at 22:39:36, Michel Chassey wrote:
>On February 28, 2000 at 16:52:43, Christophe Theron wrote:
>
>>On February 28, 2000 at 16:17:39, Michel Chassey wrote:
>>
>>> /*
>>> TOP SECRET Microsoft(c) Code
>>> Project: Chicago(tm)
>>> Projected release-date: MAY 1998
>>> $History$
>>> */
>>>
>>> #include "win31.h"
>>> #include "win95.h"
>>> #include "evenmore.h"
>>> #include "oldstuff.h"
>>> #include "billrulz.h"
>>> #define INSTALL = HARD
>>>
>>> char make_prog_look_big[1600000];
>>>
>>> void main()
>>> {
>>> while(!CRASHED)
>>> {
>>> display_copyright_message();
>>> display_bill_rules_message();
>>> do_nothing_loop();
>>> if (first_time_installation)
>>> {
>>> make_50_megabyte_swapfile();
>>> do_nothing_loop();
>>> totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();
>>>
>>> search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS/2();
>>> hang_system();
>>> }
>>> write_something(anything);
>>> display_copyright_message();
>>> do_nothing_loop();
>>> do_some_stuff();
>>> if (still_not_crashed)
>>> {
>>> display_copyright_message();
>>> do_nothing_loop();
>>> basically_run_windows_3.1();
>>> do_nothing_loop();
>>> do_nothing_loop();
>>> }
>>> }
>>>
>>> if (detect_cache())
>>> disable_cache();
>>>
>>> if (fast_cpu())
>>> {
>>> set_wait_states(lots);
>>> set_mouse(speed, very_slow);
>>> set_mouse(action, jumpy);
>>> set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);
>>> }
>>>
>>> /* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11"); */
>>> /* printf("Welcome to Windows 95"); */
>>> printf("Welcome to Windows 98");
>>> if (system_ok())
>>> crash(to_dos_prompt);
>>> else
>>> system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp" O_CREATE);
>>
>>
>>OK, I think that now I know what's wrong in W98. In the line above, there is a
>>coma missing.
>>
>>Can you please insert a coma so that the line looks like:
>>
>> system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp", O_CREATE);
>>
>>recompile everything, and try it?
>>
>>It should be much better. I'm not asking any money for this fix. I don't want to
>>be responsible for MS future financial problems.
>>
>>:)
>>
>>
>> Christophe
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>> while(something)
>>> {
>>> sleep(5);
>>> get_user_input();
>>> sleep(5);
>>> act_on_user_input();
>>> sleep(5);
>>> }
>>> create_general_protection_fault();
>>> }
>Thanks Christophe, now could you please explain the
>create_general_protection_fault() function ? If Windows has it, I won't
>have to write one up in my program.
>Incidently the above snipet was lifted from : http://protools.cjb.net/
>More fun stuff where this came from.
>
>Michel Chassey
>Icq #34801616
Unfortunately I don't know about this create_general_protection_fault stuff.
I used to meet "General Failure" under DOS. I know this general personally, I
have met him often enough to say it's a good friend of mine.
But I don't know why they have changed the general in Windows. Maybe Failure has
retired. He was very tired. He was always asking to "abort, retry, or ignore".
He could not talk about anything else...
Christophe
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